Conversations With Cady

Over the last year, I’ve grown so much. In isolation, I reflected. While parts of me are the same, parts of me have evolved and I think it’s time for a reintroduction.  Hi, I’m Cady.  I am a native Floridian. A lover of sunrises, sunsets, and sunshine in general. For the past several years, I have practiced as an estate and trust litigation attorney. I have learned so much from my practice. Litigation taught me about organization, confidence, and public speaking. The stressful environment taught me about balance and prioritizing. Some days the practice of law sucks. Other days it sucks less. Regardless, I have learned to manage the stress and negativity by focusing on my needs.  I want to help other professionals in high-stress environments with similar issues - overcoming burnout, recovering from perfectionism, and finding joy in the day to day. I started a coaching business earlier this year to do just that. Everyone has the opportunity to create a balanced, fulfilled l...

Early this year I found myself crying after a hearing that was continued to a later date. I had prepared for weeks. I researched, wrote an outline of my argument, identified the questions I wanted to ask the witnesses, and was overly prepared to appear before the judge. It went fine but we didn’t finish. We were required to reschedule the remainder of the hearing nearly two months later. I was deflated. I had put so much time and energy into prepping for this hearing only to have no resolution. The end was delayed. All I could see was the many more hours I would now have to put in to prepare for the continued hearing. The many more days and nights this matter would be floating around in my head. It felt like I could not focus on anything else or rest until it was over.  That, my friends, is burnout. It is working too much, expending endless energy on certain issues, personal matters, clients, or cases that you literally cannot function. You begin to distort your own reality. You sa...

Timelines are arbitrary. There is no right time to do anything - to settle down and start a family, to go to school, to start a new business. I try to wrap my head around the many timelines I set in my life. I am at a loss. I cannot for the life of me tell you why I said I wanted to do something by a certain date. Why did I want to be a partner in my own firm by 30? Why did I want to have 20 clients by the end of the year? Some may say I am an ambitious goal setter. Some may say that by having goals, I was motivated to work harder.  That's bullshit. I have never worked harder because I had a goal I was trying to meet. I was not more motivated. In fact, the only result of timelines was disappointment. I was sad that I said I was going to do something by a certain timeframe and then did not. I felt guilt and shame. I let myself down.  Again, that's bullshit. Timelines are unnecessary when you are not guaranteed the next day. So you didn't meet your goal? So what? Life goes on...

Society is rigid and we are constantly putting pressure on ourselves to meet quotas, accomplish lofty goals, make a certain income. Why? What do we accomplish by defining ourselves by the hours spent or the money earned? When we ditch the rules and honor our flow, we open the door to abundant possibilities. We say "yes" to things we would be encouraged to disregard. We do what is right for us at that time, not because we are supposed to, but because it feels like the right decision. No timelines, no rules, no walls. Goal setting used to be a priority for me. I wanted to accomplish X by age Y. Then I accomplished those things and nothing happened. I didn't grow or learn. I barely celebrated. I went from meeting one goal to creating a new one. I have also set unrealistic rules in my life - no sugar for a month, workout five times a week, meditate daily. Routine is great but when you're living in a set of rules, you'll inevitably let yourself down when you break a ru...